How to achieve respect for her husband: 5 golden rules3 597
In addition to love, the basis of any full-fledged relationship between a man and a woman, other factors play an important role, without which the union of two people is impossible. Love alone is not enough to build harmony in the family and a sense of satisfaction with marriage. The list of necessary things should include respect for each other, mutual understanding, mutual assistance, patience, pliability, common goals, etc. Each person has an individual list. And if the partners are similar in the basics and understanding of what is needed for their happy relationship, they will be strong, high-quality and long-lasting. If not - the union is doomed to parting.
Often the stumbling block is the lack of clarity of understanding and different views of the spouses on these factors, leading to the consolidation of relations. Undoubtedly, everyone wants to receive attention and care, to feel necessary and meaningful. But people invest in these concepts different things. For one person, the concern is to see breakfast prepared by the spouse every morning.A partner may perceive such a desire as a desire to impose the role of a home free chef. The husband may consider the show of respect from the wife around the clock willingness to accept and entertain his friends, while the woman is perceived as the highest degree of disrespect for her personality and desires.
Thus, the values and important things are nominally the same for everyone. The content of the concepts and, accordingly, the expectations are different.
Hence, quarrels, family conflicts, scandals and separation.
The underlying cause of family misunderstandings does not lie in the difference in content, which is a natural consequence of the different experiences, beliefs, and perceptions of the world around us. The reason is the inability or unwillingness to voice the definition of factors that will be the foundation for building quality relationships that take into account the interests of both partners. People, often with some kind of understanding of care or respect, think that the other person perceives it in the same way. Unfortunately not so. Therefore, instead of taking offense at each other because of the mismatch of expectations, it is worth peacefully discussing what you are investing in this or that concept.And for such an event requires respect.
Respectful attitude is an unobtrusive and tolerant report of one's point of view without the intention to subordinate to oneself the will of another, careful attitude to the feelings of another.
Often couples sin disrespectful attitude towards each other.
Disrespect is manifested in the desire to dominate, assert oneself, control the identity of the spouse through manipulations (conscious or unconscious), increase of voice, physical impact, etc.
Such aggressive behavior is inherent in both men and women. Women show disrespect for their spouse more often on an emotional level through a variety of manipulations. Men demonstrate disrespect at the cognitive and physical levels. A woman screams and cries; a man convinces a woman of insignificance and subordinates her physically.
Whatever the options for demonstrating disrespect for each other, one result - the gradual destruction of relationships, the dying of feelings and frustration in each other.
Especially the feeling of disrespect for yourself greatly affects a woman.A woman is guided and manifests herself emotionally, on a sensual level. If a woman is filled with joy and peace, then her energy is transmitted to others. Next to such a woman is warm and comfortable. But if her female energy centers are affected, the woman does not have the strength to fulfill her function - to fill a man with energy, give care to children, feel desirable and happy. From a sense of disrespect for herself, a woman loses her motivation for realization. In the end, everyone suffers.
In fact, disrespect from a man does not appear just like that. This is preceded by certain prerequisites in the form of the actions of the woman herself, her words and her life position. Not every woman a man is able to treat disrespectfully. Therefore, if you want to be such a woman for your husband, the following tips will certainly help to dot the i.
He should know what qualities his wife has and how to use them. His positive reaction will serve as an excellent motivation for your new achievements and confidence.
Respect your husband
If you speak disrespectfully to your husband, then he has no reason to speak with you respectfully. There is no way that a husband and the whole world around is bad, and you are a flower. Your husband is your choice. If you do not respect your husband - do not respect your choice, it means yourself. Logics.
So if you want respect for your husband - start respecting him. Perhaps you have reached the degree of relationship that you simply have no reason to respect a man. Then make a decision - leave or try to build relationships. If you choose the second, then change yourself. Your changes will not go unnoticed. Your respect for the man will be appreciated and accepted. It is important to take the first step.
- If a man expresses his opinion - do not interrupt.
- If a man showed concern for you - thank.
- If a man is confused - support.
- If a man makes you laugh - laugh both in plenty.
There is no man who has nothing to respect.
Make a list of the values of your husband and watch him. As soon as he manifests one of his merits - notice this, praise. Thus, you will kill two birds with one stone - raise his self-esteem and increase his importance in your eyes.
Set your personal boundaries
In order to get respect from a husband, you need to voice to him what you understand by the word “respect for you” and, consequently, the husband shows disrespect for you.
Compliance with boundaries is an exclusively individual matter. If you told your husband that raising your voice is unacceptable, then at the very first attempt to get around the rule, you should stop talking / leave / ignore him (think in advance of the options of "punishment" for violating your borders). If you, by setting boundaries, every time you allow your husband to violate them, then there can be no talk of any respect on his part. Have come up with a rule - follow without any "but".
In this case, it will take patience and courage, because sometimes husbands violate the boundaries of wives in such a way that it is simply impossible not to get away from such You must be prepared for this.
Increase your self-esteem
Often women suffer the disrespect of their spouse due to low self-esteem. Here I am so stupid ... Fat cow ...
And with what joy is it that you think so bad about yourself? Stop and decide that you will not think about yourself anymore. Accordingly, take measures for self-improvement. If you do not cook well - go to cooking classes or practice with the help of online workshops. If you are overweight - run to the gym or wind circles around the house. Do not sit back in insults and complexes.
Bad thoughts will not help. Only purposeful activity will bring results. As soon as you see the first results, your self-esteem will increase, your importance for yourself and, consequently, for your husband will increase.
Confident woman with clear personal boundaries, ready to defend them, it is impossible not to respect.
Consult a psychologist
Often disrespect on the part of a man is connected with the psychological attitudes of the woman herself, to get to the bottom of which can be difficult on her own.Sometimes disrespect for a woman is dictated by her parental experience and a corresponding pattern of behavior when disrespect is perceived as the norm of relationships. Or disrespect is the subconscious payment of a woman for any benefits in union with a man. Therefore, a visit to a professional psychologist will help find out the true cause of the problem and effectively deal with it.
TATIANA BELOKONSKAYA, specially for Evrikak.ru
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